Columbia Sportswear Will Give the Whole Company Away, to Anyone Who Can Prove the Earth Is Flat

If you’re a bored FLAT-EARTHER who looks FANTASTIC in Columbia jackets, this is your golden ticket:

A new ad from Columbia Sportswear features CEO Tim Boyle challenging flat-Earthers.  He says, “You guys claim there’s an end to the Earth?  Well, just go snap a picture.  Send it to us.  And you get the assets of the company.  All of it.”

Yeah.  He claims they’ll give the whole company away, Willy Wonka-style, to anyone who can go to the “edge” of the “flat” Earth, and take a photo of it.  And obviously, he won’t accept A.I. images.

The photo must be of “a visible, physical end to the planet Earth, [showing the] infinite sheer drop, abyssal void, and clouds cascading into infinity.”

For more clarification, they include a few things that are NOT the “edge of the Earth,” such as:  “A clifftop in Seattle.  A cul-de-sac in Kansas.  Or your buddy Dave legally changing his name to ‘The Edge.'”  (Like the dude in U2.)

For legal reasons, or out of cowardice, I guess, they don’t mention “Columbia Sportswear” in the prize.

In the fine print, it says “The company refers to ‘The Company, LLC’ with assets which are valued at $100,000.”  (Which would NOT be all of Columbia.)

(Here’s the ad.  It’s tongue-in-cheek, and a smart ad, since Tim advises the explorers of #ExpeditionImpossible to wear Columbia gear, because “you’ll need it.”)

(Of course, this goes against the typical conspiracy theorists’ playbook. Most flat-Earthers’ evidence is only REJECTING actual science, and things like satellite images and air and sea travel, without actually providing proof to the contrary.  So, come on folks, have at it!)

 

(Marketing Dive)